give it up

no...i haven't heard from ol' george from my last entry. out of town or not, i'm sure you could have found "a second" as there are a lot of seconds in 9 days. but honestly, i've had way more pressing issues to deal with, like my complete and utter failure at lent.

i gave up sugar and soda, and though i haven't let a drop of soda touch my lips, i have poorly resisted sweets. last sunday, i slipped up and had some vegan strawberry shortcake...and a very un-vegan brownie on monday...actually three brownies...partially because i felt entitled because of the week i'd had and partially because my boss said episcopalians have sundays "off." i'm no episcopalian, so i'm not sure why i thought that would apply to me. anyway, i decided to make up for it by going to bible study monday at a catholic church (though i'm not catholic either) for the first time in my life and hoped that would make up for my "transgression."

i have since reassessed the whole sugar/soda thing and figured that indulging in one or the other isn't going to make me a bad person and that i should probably spend these 40 days figuring out how to be better, more grounded, more full of hope and faith, than worrying about what's going into my mouth. not to say i'm going on a sugar binge. i still haven't had soda, and i will do my very best to resist the "temptations of the sweet."

on another note, i DID meet a guy today. yes, he was homeless. and shirtless. with the biggest knockers i've ever seen on a dude. ass crack stretching well above the rim of his pants, a sham-wow swaying from his belt.

i have this thing with homeless guys. i don't know why i attract them, but i do. it's a characteristic i'd like to shake, but as i learned today, it persists. so, during lunch, i saw this guy moseying across Western, dodging traffic, and as soon as i saw him, i knew, KNEW, that i wasn't going to make it through this intersection without some sort of interaction. the light turned red. i pulled to a stop and focused my attention on the sidewalk on the opposite side of the street.

the first thing i heard was some yelling that i couldn't decipher. i looked to the sidewalk, hoping that it might be anyone but him. then i heard it again. and again.
and before i knew it, he'd cut through waiting traffic and landed next to my passenger door...which was locked, fortunately.
he said something. "what?" i asked. i wasn't about to roll down the window. he said it again. "what?" i turned the music down.
"you wanna give me a ride?" he inquired, his tits bulging toward the pavement.
"no," i smiled.
"well, i just wanted to say hi."
"hi," i waved and wondered what the people behind me and in front of me were thinking behind their locked doors.
"come on. give me a ride," he tried again, but this time, he added a little something extra. his tongue came out his mouth, slowly, like an animal caged for far too long, and he proceeded to show me all the ways he could please me with it. at least, i assume that's what he was doing with the flicking and undulating, contracting and expanding. i rolled my eyes and turned the other way, hoping my rejection would send him on his way. but no. he stood there, tonguing on the other side of the window until i was FINALLY able to drive again. the last thing i saw was his crack and his sham-wow dipping through cars on their way to the sidewalk.

so...yeah...one door closes and another opens and there's a homeless guy with an eager tongue behind it.

i think i gave up dating for lent too, L.A.